This board is programmed to delete 500 oldest page topic after a certain period of time. So there will be no more than 500 pages of topics no matter what the subject.
The suckage has been around for over 2 decades, newsucks500.com, since 2007. Always open for anyone's use, without the requirement of registering.
Have fun, and just let it all out!
Are these cunts mental?! That's the bloody stupidest thing I've heard of since I learned the Yanks call chocolatey globbernaughts a candy bar! Your wife needs to know her place! In a proper British marriage such as mine, it is she who watches while I get buggered by a large colored bloke! Tell them more Raymond, I know you were quite a hit with the blacks and Pakis before the obesity set in.
Every time I see a post by ChrisM or one of his sock puppet accounts, it puts me right to sleep. I can't help it, it's like being shot with a tranquilizer dart.
I will be posting updates on my pedophile lifestyle.
Today, I broke my sons arms for the 4th time since the beginning of the year. I also wanked my tinycock furiously to pictures of young 10 years old boys.
Every day we see an article about this ginger shitstab and his gay autobiography he's publishing. A book about his shit life in his child raping shit family in the shit dumpster known as the Jewnited Kingdom.
What makes our media think we give a shit about this fag and his incest-ridden family? Faggot acting all tough for killing a few boucack fighters that were armed with sticks and stones, big deal, fag. I hope he gets raped in the ass by niggA gangstaz.
Rage and seethe, fag. Looks like you don't like to be given a taste of your own medicine isn't it Ray Pedo Hewitt? Pretend all you want that you dont care: we all know you're SEETHING and COPING, you boyfucker. End your life by hanging, cunt
The snow is still melting off me, now I gotta replace this damn window. :mad: In the meantime I put some Saran wrap and duct tape around it, damn cold out there it is...
Because it was fucking hilarious! I can just picture Mitch McConnell, Nancy Pelosi, and all those other decrepit old fucks shitting their pants when some retard dressed as a Viking shaman shows up with a whole mob of inbred rednecks and fatasses. Fuckin' LOL
Chris, you actual retarded cuntfuck. You still a filthy pedo you disgusting niggerschlong sucking schizo? You still groom kids in the McDonalds playground while you stuff your fat fucking cuntface with hamburgers? How do you even chew with all those rotten teeth you enormous homofag? Disgusting! You shit-slurping swine motherfuck. You make niggers look human. Kill yourself.
I wish that:
- Joe Biden becomes so senile he gives a speech when having forgotten to dress, with his filthy limp cock hanging out
- Donald Trump goes to prison and gets assraped by inmate nigger homosexual jEws
- Putin defenestrates himself
- I become filthy rich so I can buy Twitter, Fecesbook and TikTok and ban everyone for massive lulz
- Pukerape gets legalized
- ChrisM to keep on posting here because he's indeed retarded but fun to laugh at. I do wish this cock-smoking, obese shitstab...
SOMEONE PLEASE KILL ME
I'm in the Ilford bariatric ward. Just ask to see the fattest person they have. I told them I have a gay bald faggot uncle named Fred, so use that name.
I hope you bought lots of presents for your family! That's what the Holidays are all about, spending lots of money! You do love your family, don't you? Better buy more gifts just to be safe, I made sure that all the major retailers have extended holiday hours!
That's why I'm here with a great offer on a low interest credit card! You don't want to feel left behind on New Year's Eve, do you? Of course not! You want to get on a plane or a train so you can ring in the new year in Times Square! New York City is a beautiful place, you know. Don't forget about Valentine's Day too! You think us Jews are greedy? Try telling your wife or girlfriend that she's not getting a fancy dinner, some flowers, jewelry, and a pile of other gifts for Valentine's Day. If...
My first order of business will be tracking all users' IP addresses. If I catch you posting under multiple names, I will expose you to the whole board, and I'll probe it by posting the relevant admin logs.
Second, we're getting an arcade. Flash games no longer exist, so I'll be providing downloads for various mobile games for Android and iOS. The purpose of these games is to raise money for the board. I'm a broke asshole who can't afford a negligible payment once a year, so this is necessary....
I never saw the first one and don't give a fuck to. Now it's tanking... It's like.. how out of touch are you niggers that you think people want to help some alien nation of faggots when we can't even look after or care about ourselves these days?
Fart in my mouth
Don't even ask me
Just fart in my mouth
I am a gay cunt
Just fart in my mouth
I am well randy
Just fart in my mouth
I'll buy you a shandy
Just fart in my mouth
The following people are trash and need to die preferably by being impaled by an electric pole that fell from a crane, all the way through their shit-infestred throat out of their filthy re(K)tum. PLease feel free to add more to the list
- Elon Musk
- Jeff Bezos
- Donald Trump
- Vladimir Putin
- Shia LeButtfuck
- Kanye Niggerwest
- All the Kardashishioshashishioshashishans
- Ellen Degenerate
The Holy Deathpuke be praised, the following people did the world a favor and fucking died in 2022....
Mehmet started well with a flurry of quick punches, which seemed to annoy Mick rather than hurt him. Mick returned fire with a two peice and a biscuit that split open Mehmets lips and nose.
Mehmet then threw a massive over hand right, but Mick quickly countered with a gigantic uppercut ending the fight and also Mehmets life.
King Kong Farts
Rancid and Furious
Fart Off
Fartians of the Galaxy
13 Farts
The Fartout
The Power of the Fart
Fartman
I Know That You Farted Last Summer
Cool Fartings
Wakanda Fartever
I Was Never Really Farting
The Fart House
Four Good Farts
One Good Fart
The Other Farts
Windtalkers
Stench of Iniquity
Queen of Farts
Fart Captain and the World of Turds
You: Driving your 1989 Ford Escort around town with two gallons of gas in the tank and using the spare tire because you can't afford a patch. Come on now Melvin, get some ambition.
Ahab died first after being decapitated by a devastating clothesline. She then grabbed hold of Rwc and powerbombed him off of the empire state building exploding his fat body on impact
Now where are Americans supposed to take their ugly fucking families with their fat wives and fat bratty kids and engorge themselves on cheap, highly processed food?
Been testing out old web browsers on old operating systems to see what pages on the internet still work. Found a great search engine called that I installed as the home page in all browsers. Checked out this site back in the archives when I first created it, and it still works in Windows 95 IE 4.0. Gave me a brainstorm idea to revive that old code for old web browsing. I still have the old source code for that shoutbox at the bottom. I could totally recreate that. Not for this shit hole of...
.... up your game m8's
Still pouring out the same old shite about Chris :biggrin: so he's sent me for now as he's as bored shitless as am I :wink:
I await the same mundane replies
I'm not much for words, as sanitation management is a position which rarely requires me to address the public. I'll just cut to the chase. Last night, we discovered a very obese man in our landfill wandering about and yammering about your web site. He identified himself as Daddycool 55, ChrisMuttonshutter, and Zoink . He flat out refused to give a real name, but insisted that other users here - users he identified as Baldy, Faggot, and Greg - would know who he is. I'm not interested in learning...
I WAS AT THE ILFORD DVD RENTAL TO MEET THESE FUCKING POOF CUNTS THAT WANTED A COLLECTIVE FIGHT. THAT STINKING BOUCACK MAD MEHMET DIDN'T SHOW HIS PIG ASS AND BIG ADELE WENT INTO DIABETIC SHOCK EVEN BEFORE WE STARTED
I TOTALLY DESTROYED THE REST OF THESE POOF DWEEBS. ASSRAPED THEM WITH A BROKEN LAMPPOST AND BROKE ALL THEIR LIMBS. ALL OF THEM CRIED AND BEGGED, THOSE SODOMITES
Why do you not euthanize this fat fuck ChrisMuttonpissflap? Clearly, suicide is his only option? Even his gay buddy Alfie Davies is probably sick of this incestfuck
Stunk so bad my flat m8's dived out the windows to escape the stench! My britches are shot and I'm out of pence for the month. I might have to borrow some clothes from my dead flatmates as two of them died in the fall. We're on the third floor.
Fucking pervert!! I HOPE YOU ROT IN HELL YOU FAT PREDATOR PIECE OF SHIT! I thought you were a neighbour I could trust! I will press charges you fat poofter
Shoot yourself in your fat acne-ridden face you enormous no-life child-touching cockfag.
Your entire life revolves around this forum. U upset m8? :biggrin:
Cut yourself. :biggrin:
Tomorrow will be a day to remember for all time. The air in this place will have a green haze to it and I have two spare toilets and a plumber on retainer.
Someone is stealing my ideas. But it smelled great, I hit the stop button and splattered the side of the wall with guy goo. Which reminds me I just had a fart now. Was quite watery sounding and smelled of double cheeseburgers and rotten fruit.
I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU AND SMASH YOUR HEAD LIKE AN ACCORDEON YOU BOUCAK FUCK. COLE AND SEE ME AT THE ILFORD DVD RENTAL AND YOU WILL DIE VIOLENTLY, FAG
Considering I need Phreakwars' help every time I get a message about updating and my network guy only knows SQL and not much of this coding stuff, I am relinquishing ownership back to Phreakwars effective March 1st. I like the site and you guys are hilarious but I can't do this. I'm on the road too much to bother. I even forgot the admin password until recently. Scott and I will still be here posting as a guest from time to time though. Hopefully Phreakwars can do some google stuff to increase...
So, honestly, I was not really looking to revive NewSucks500. It was cool and all of Nick to reopen the place and sell it back to me, but in all honesty I kind of do other things that I don't wanna really bother with another domain. I'm showing there is about a month or so left before this domain expires, guess I'll have to think about what I want to do with it. Whatever I decide, it's been fun seeing you guys again.
Did you steal your mothers smartphone again you fat fuck? At least as long as you're locked in that fatass ward you're not raping kids and breaking their arm you obese fuck. Toss yourself off some stairs.
My dumps have been becoming more smelly and more massive than ever before. They load me down like a freight train until I unleash them into the wild. I was sitting on the throne pondering this and other scientific theories when I realized that soon enough my dumps will no longer be dumps, they will either convert into antimatter or condense into some type of singularity that will create a supermassive black hole destroying our entire solar system to compete with the black hole at the center of...
First three had a lot of mass to them. It was like *plunk* *plunk* *PLOP*. The third one hit the bowl like a boulder and splashed my ass a bit. Number 4 was a bit smaller. I sat there a bit thinking about my latest theorem. Then came number 5. It was a bit larger than number 4 and I thought i was done. But then I felt another. And then number 7 came. Then number 8. I lost count after that. I think I finished on 10 or 11. It smelled pretty ape like in there, like a Sasquatch came in and took a...
Hello everyone. This guy named ChrisMuttonshutter sent me a PM saying he wanted to fart all over my willy and bollucks . What is that all about? It creeped me out a bit.
But I was able to use my phone covertly between two rounds of antibiotics for my feces-induced infection.
Doctors are not sure I'll survive, but I still wank my smallcock to pics of little boys :biggrin:
This might be my last post here, we'll see if I survive m8.com
ta
The weekend almost being finished, I share my report of the SHIT-PILLARS production of the past two days: Saturday I produced SHIT-PILLARS 4x. Had to flush several times too to prevent the Toilet. from getting clogged with all the toilet paper.
Today, Sunday, I took only 3 shits. But been farting all day. They don't smell though: probably been gulping too much air. But they were some properly enriched mega-bulky SHIT-PILLARS.be m8
I farted on the elevator and it stunk pretty bad. When I released teh kraken I had some huge splashback. My arse is still soaked. texting from the shitter can be hazardous. My phone is water resistant, but not deep sea diver rated. :heil:
You filthy British blubberfuck. You are pure fatness. Get your fat fuckery out of here before some British faggot destroys you after stabbing the shit of your nigger boyfriend whom you cocksuck every night. Fat skank.
When I pushed it out, I had to use some extreme force I could hear and feel like back crack. Then my back felt much better after that. I highly recommend this as opposed to seeing a chiropractor. :cool:
Only fags, retards and cunts use Twatter. If you also use it, I suggest eating a massive bowl of AIDS infected boucack fatcocks and cutting your wrists. Shitstab.
Friends, Raymond (you know him as Chrismuttonshutter) is not well. You may have noticed he's not very active here at the moment. He has been locked up in the bariatric ward of the Ilford hospital again with no access to the outside world. It's for his own good. His obsession with eating faeces is out of control and he was admitted to the hospital with severe bacterial infections in his blood as well as his gums from all the shit he eats. The walls of his room in the basement were smeared with...
Trump was a dumb cunt but he was right about those chinks: you can't trust those slantnigger untermenschen. Unfortunately, the West has prostituted themselves to this nation of backstabbers. Fuck China, fuck Xi Jingping and fuck your fat stinking WHORE of a mother.
I WILL GRAB YOU BY THE FUCKING HAIR AND SMACK YOU ON THE GROUND. THEN I WILL BOOT STOMP YOUR BLOATED FACE AND SHAVE OFF YOUR HAIR YOU FILTHY COCAINE WHORE. WHEN IM DONE, I'LL TAKE A SHIT ON YOUR CHEST. COME AND SEE ME AT THE ILFORD DVD RENTAL, CUNT
THEY TRIED TO JUMP ME AS I WAS PICKING UP THREE MEN AND A LITTLE LADY FROM THE ILFORD DVD RENTAL.
OSCAR RAN AT ME SCREAMING LIKE A RETARD, SO I QUICKLY THREW A MASSIVE OVERHAND RIGHT THAT COMPLETELY DESTROYED HIS FACE. ADELE WAS HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS AND TRIED TO RUN. I GRABBED HER BY HER MASSIVE CANKLES AND SMASHED HER INTO A WALL UNTIL SHE WAS DEAD.
Made in Kiev! Show your support, goyim! You don't want people to think you support Russia, do you? Buy my Ukraine flags and let everyone know what a good person you are!